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Foreigner Catches Case of Actual Yellow Fever
In a grim irony, lifelong Asian fetishist Bob McLark was diagnosed with the deadly Yellow Fever virus in Yeongdong Severance hospital this week. Says McLark, “the pain of liver failure is made bearable by the ministrations of these lovely, elegant Korean nurses with their long, shiny black hair and mysterious, cat-like eyes.”
‘Korean Police Story’ Sinks at the Box Office
Audiences were said to be turned off by extending scenes of gum chewing and ass scratching. Climactic cap dusting scene also fails to impress.
Number of Eyelids in Korea Nearly Doubles
Despite no significant increase in the population, the number of eyelids in Korea has nearly doubled. In a completely unrelated story, a local plastic surgeon was seen rolling around in a pile of cash.